The Small Family   

There are a lot of things no one tells you when you have a child--some good, some not so good--and I’ve come to the conclusion that one of them is that holidays are chaotic and exhausting! And so it was with our Christmas week, which was overall a great week, but which was both chaotic and utterly exhausting! Thank goodness Christmas was on a Friday, so we have a couple days to recover before the workweek begins again.

Chris had the full week off, and I really wanted to take Tuesday through Friday off, so I spent much of the week prior working until 1:00 a.m. or later in preparation for taking four days off. In retrospect, this was not my wisest idea! By the time Tuesday rolled around, I was pretty darn tired. We headed down to San Jose in the late morning, to coincide with Theo’s nap, and had a pleasant drive while he slept for two of the two-and-a-half hours. Success! And actually, the day went very well. We went over to Grandma Kathy and Grandpa Tom’s house and visited with them, and later on, Tanya, Steve, and Nik arrived…followed by Aunt Carol and Uncle Erryl and Aunt Linda and Uncle Bill, who came over for pizza. In the past Theo has sometimes gotten a little rattled around crowds of people, and he’s been sick and crabby for a few weeks on top of not sleeping too well lately, so we weren’t sure how he’d react, but he did just fine.  He’s quite the charmer when he wants to be, that boy of ours! I think the amusing highlight of the evening was Theo deciding that his soy yogurt looked a lot like Mama’s shampoo, so he would grab handfuls, “lather” it up with his hands, and smear it in his hair. Oh, he was a happy mess!!

And so, it was the nights when the chaos and exhaustion hit. Our days were good…our nights were horrendous! After our pizza dinner with the family, Chris, Theo, and I headed to our hotel in Campbell. We got a one-bedroom suite, since in the past it has worked well to have a bit of separation between us and Theo in hotels--if we’re in a studio-type room, we have a much harder time getting him to go to sleep because there’s no place for us to retreat to. So this suite had a living area, a tiny kitchenette, and a bedroom (and a bathroom, of course!), and we set up Theo’s bed (a hotel-provided Pack-n-Play) in the main living area, away from the window and vents so he wouldn’t be too hot or too cold. Simple, right? Um, no. He fussed and cried all night long. Literally. He slept, but very fitfully--lots of tossing and turning and crying. And lately, he’s going through a phase where if we’re not in the room when he falls asleep, he goes ballistic. (This is a new thing--he used to go to sleep on his own just fine. We think it’s either just a phase or maybe a result of him not feeling up to par.) So, after getting woken up several times, I finally just decided to sleep on the couch next to him. Between all his fussing and waking, I got a whopping 2 1/2 hours of sleep that night. Chris got a slightly more impressive 5 hours, but still not enough to make him feel very rested.

Okay, it’s over…let’s get on with our Wednesday, and surely Wednesday night will be better. The poor kid must be exhausted from that lousy sleep, so let’s get him a good couple of naps and then hope for the best tonight! Um, no. We actually did have a surprisingly pleasant day, given that we were all zombies. We drove over to Santa Cruz in the morning to have brunch with Auntie Lisa and Uncle Chris, who were staying at Lisa’s parents’ house for Christmas. Because we were up so early (Theo got up for good at 5:20am, as I recall), we just drove and drove while he slept. We weren’t due at Lisa’s until 10 or after, so we drove nearly to Monterey while Theo snoozed in the car seat. It was a gorgeous, clear day, and despite being exhausted, we enjoyed the drive and seeing the ocean. Theo woke up relatively happy, though he was a bit of a terror at Lisa’s parents’ house. (They have lots of different stairways and valuables, and like any toddler, Theo wanted to explore it all. He made it all too clear that he did not like hearing the word “no” from us!) He settled down when we went to brunch, and we had a great time visiting. Not to mention, Theo’s going to look snazzy in his new outfit from Aunt Toni and Uncle Seto (Lisa’s parents) and his puffy warm jacket from Auntie Lisa and Uncle Chris. And we (Chris and I) are going to feast well on the gourmet black-truffle BBQ sauce that Lisa and Chris gave us, as well as the marionberry jam. This after I get back from a jog in my nifty new jogging shirt that Lisa got me!

After dropping Lisa and Chris back off, we drove back to Sunnyvale to go see Great-Grandma Norma (Grandma Kathy’s Mom). Theo got another hour nap in the car, much to our delight, and he was very, very good at Grandma Norma’s house. She gave him a very nice present, which we’ll be using to start him a savings account as soon as we make it over to the bank.

And then, we went to Grandma Kathy and Grandpa Tom’s house for a quiet evening of clam chowder and crab salad from the Fish Market (one of my favorite Bay Area restaurants!). Theo was happy to play with his grandparents again, and we headed back to the hotel for what we hoped would be a better night.

Cue the foreboding music now…duh duh DUH… We put Theo down at the hotel, and he fell asleep by about 9:30. His normal bedtime is 7:30, so that was late but still reasonable. Chris crossed his fingers and prayed for 10 hours of sleep from the boy. Um, no. We went to bed right away, in case the night was awful again, and it’s a good thing we did. After two hours of sleep, Theo woke up screaming…and proceeded to scream for an hour straight. No joke. We tried everything to calm him down, and he was inconsolable. It was like when he was an infant and would scream nonstop for no discernible reason--he was just in a wailing frenzy! We tried patting his back, laying down next to him, turning on the lights, taking him into our bed, giving him a bottle, holding him upright on the couch (in case his ears were bugging him), walking up and down the room with him, setting him down on the floor…you name it. Nothing. Nada. Zip, zero, zilch…he kept screaming. At this point it was 12:30 a.m., and I was afraid we might get booted from the hotel for disturbing the guests. And so, in a moment of desperation, we popped in a Baby Einstein DVD. And…silence. And then happy babbling. Theo was all too happy to watch his good friend Caterpillar at 12:30 in the morning, and we were very glad we had brought the DVD “in case of emergency.” Hmmm, but will he ever go back to sleep? That was the eternal question. After a bit of heated discussion, I sent Chris back to bed. I was not about to have to stay in the hotel an extra night, so I wanted to make sure at least one of us was rested enough to drive the 150 miles home the next day! Theo’s DVD ended after 30 minutes, and he started fussing again…but less than before. It took another hour, but I finally got him back down to sleep and wearily crawled onto the couch at 2am. He woke again at 4am, but went back to sleep fairly quickly that time. And at 6am, our morning began…with two exhausted parents and a toddler who had slept a grand total of six broken hours, when he normally gets 11 or 12 hours. Joy. (I must add that it sounds like I shouldered the brunt of middle-of-the-night childcare, and I did…but not for Chris’ lack of offering. The first night I volunteered to take the couch and tend to Theo because I never sleep very well in hotels anyway. The second night, I was determined that Chris get enough sleep to drive us home safely the next day, so I insisted that he go into the bedroom and shut the door while I stayed up. He argued a bit with me but then saw the logic behind my reasoning and agreed to go sleep. So he’s a good guy…not a poop who thoughtlessly left his wife to deal with the screaming kid two nights in a row!)

And so now it’s Christmas Eve, and we pack up and head over to Grandma Kathy and Grandpa Tom’s house for our Christmas celebration with them and Tanya, Steve, and Nik. And we had a very good time…Theo was pleasant despite being WAY overtired, and we had a really nice morning exchanging gifts and eating a delicious breakfast that they prepared--strata, pastries, fruit, juice, coffee…yum! We were all very spoiled with lots of nice gifts--Theo’s favorite from Grandma and Grandpa was probably his very nifty garbage truck with lots of moving parts and things to play with. He is enamored of anything that goes vrrrooom, so he was a happy camper. Chris and I got a couple games, a couple DVDs, Starbucks gift cards (they know us well!), a pretty sweater and scarf (for me!), a cookbook (for Chris, the slow-cooker-obsessed guy), etc. The boys didn’t quite seem to get the concept of opening presents, but they were just excited by all the festivities.

After brunch, we drove home--about three hours, and Theo napped for 2 1/2 of it. Bliss! Grandma Diane offered to come babysit Theo for an hour while Chris and I built his kitchen, and we gratefully took her up on it. We originally planned to build it after he went to bed, but we were so darn tired that we figured it best to do it before he went to bed so we could just collapse come 8:00 or so! (Besides, my Mom had received a package of cookies from Aunt Laurel, and Chris and I were very excited to gorge ourselves on those, so we invited Mom over with the warning that if she forgot to bring the cookies, we wouldn’t let her in the door. Yes, my Aunt Laurel’s cookies are THAT good! :-) Theo was very excited to show Grandma his new toys, and she brought some flashcards for him to play with, too. (He’s obsessed with flashcards.) To thank her, we had Grandma stay for dinner with us--a truly gourmet meal of hamburgers and fries. (But Chris makes darn good hamburgers, so it’s actually more exciting than it might sound!) And then, we slept. Theo did a little better, though Chris had to go bunk with him at 1:30. But after that, he slept until 7 or so, so we were happy.

The boys got me up at 7, and we all went downstairs together. Theo immediately spied the play kitchen in front of the Christmas tree, pointed and exclaimed “that!” and wiggled to be put down. I set him down, and he ran right over and started playing with the kitchen. He loves the microwave oven perhaps best of all. We were really amused to see him immediately grab a play cup, put it in the microwave, close the door, and press the buttons to “cook” whatever was in his cup. All morning he kept going back to the kitchen to play more, so I think we hit the ball out of the park with that gift--he’s crazy about it! Saturday morning, I couldn’t even get him to eat breakfast because he wanted to go play with his kitchen. Yay!

The rest of Theo’s gifts were wrapped, and he never really got the idea about unwrapping. He’d give a half-hearted pull on the paper, but mostly he was more interested in throwing away the paper scraps (in the giant box for the play kitchen, which we used as a garbage can of sorts) and anything else he could get his hands on. He was also very interested in whatever was in the wrapping. The minute he’d see us unwrap a toy, he’d squeal and do his sign for “help, please” until we’d open it up and get it out for him to play with. He also got a shopping cart and a Little People garage (with a spiral ramp for the cars to zoom down), and he seemed to love both of those. Although, instead of sending cars down the ramp in the garage, he prefers to just chuck the Little People down it. Ha!

As for Chris and I, we made out like bandits too. I got some jewelry from Chris (a bracelet, necklace, and earrings), a wannabe Snuggie (see the picture of Chris trying to figure it out in this week’s album!), and a giftcard to Kohl’s, along with a blissful hour of Theo-free shopping time. (Theo hates shopping and tends to whine through the whole trip, so Chris knew I would very much appreciate an hour of alone time to enjoy my giftcard.) And Chris got a game, a book, a mug with Theo’s mug (ha!!) on it, and some pajama bottoms.

I made cinnamon rolls for breakfast (don’t be too impressed--they were just Pillsbury!), and Chris made a sausage, egg, sourdough, and cheese strata for lunch, which was awesome. Grandma Diane came over around noon and had lunch and exchanged presents with us. Theo got a Leapfrog Scout dog (it knows Theo’s name and sings songs to him and plays games with him--very cool!) and a little Leapfrog letters game from Grandma…and he gave her a locket with his picture in it and a calendar with twelve months of Theo pictures. (He’s pretty sure Grandma loves any gift that features him prominently.)

For the afternoon/evening, we all went over to Auntie Lynnie and Uncle Charles’s house in Elk Grove. Theo doesn’t often get to see his cousins, so it was a really nice treat. And Auntie Lynnie made an awesome traditional dinner of turkey, dressing, sweet potatoes, cheesy potatoes, salad, etc. Yum, yum, yum! Theo scored again, getting a Little People farm, which he very much likes. He’s very into throwing all the animals down the silo. Am I seeing a trend here? He likes to throw his Little People down disturbing passageways where they might not survive! ;-) Theo was pretty tired and cranky by the time we left, but all in all, for a 20-month-old who has been sick, short on sleep, and potentially teething, he did wonderfully with all the commotion and chaos. And Chris and I FINALLY got a full night of sleep on Christmas night, which was perhaps the best gift of all. :-)

We wrapped up the weekend by going on a grown-up date to the movies while Grandma Diane watched Theo. We saw a matinee of Up in the Air and really enjoyed it. I kind of had to see it. For one, it got really good reviews. Second, I really like George Clooney. And third, the Music Supervisor on the movie is one of my authors--we’ve been working on his book since Theo was a tiny infant, and he’s forever procrastinating. Every time I email him to find out what’s going on with the book, he name-drops and gives me a billion reasons why he hasn’t been able to work on it. For the last nine months or so, it’s been, “I’m working on this movie with Clooney and Reitman…” And I always sort of roll my eyes and sigh. The name-dropping gets old, as do the excuses. But anyway, I had to see this movie that he was using as a procrastination tool for so long. And I have to admit, it was quite enjoyable. :-)

Hope you all had wonderful holidays!